Anyway. The boring updates:
- Still working part time at the pub but about to quit. I needed the extra money, but I've worked 19 straight days and am starting to miss things. Like the sunshine. And a life.
- Had a job interview for a job I would have quite liked. Thought I had a good chance, since a chunk of it was about writing and hey, I write. Nope, turns out I went on about that too much, and actually they wanted someone with more administration experience. I can do admin! Anyone can do admin! I didn't go on about it because, well, I thought everyone being interviewed would have enough frigging admin experience. Bah.
- I'm now temping at a large charity. I don't want to name names, but its one of the big ones and I'm hoping to get my foot in the door there. At the moment, I'm working as "support" staff, and what that means is I book a lot of train tickets for important people to go to important meetings. Weirdly enough, it's also quite slow paced and relaxed (read: dull).
- I have an interview coming up next week. I also have a haircut coming up the day before the interview. The two are related.
That's it, really. I work a lot, I apply for jobs, I run not as often as I should, I work another job, and I occasionally see friends. I've become dull. I feel like too much hinges on getting a job, any job, because then I can really begin my life. Only, what?
Well, I'd quit the job at the pub. I will anyway, but I'd do it immediately and with the confidence that I don't need the place. Temp jobs are precarious, and it scares me that I could walk in on Monday and they could tell me they don't need me anymore.
I'd free up some time. I spend a fair bit of time applying for jobs..and I spend a lot more staring at a blank screen, writing yet another cover letter. This free time would allow me to... do good shit. Take pictures. Run. Write. Lay the groundwork for the Big Idea, which at the moment has been shoved into some dusty, unused corner of my brain. I'd also have a nice job in which I could do good shit during the day.
I'd have a budget, not just the vague idea that I need to save every penny for an inevitable rainy day. Last week my laptop charger broke and I almost had a brain explosion wondering what if it was my computer and what I'd do and how I'd afford a new one.
I don't know, a lot of it just seems like an excuse. I could go shooting pictures today. I could be writing a novel right now. But so much of my my brain space is all job-security-job-security, that everything else seems less significant by comparison. Which is lame. I've never really been like this before.
But hey. Interviews. Progress. And stuff WILL fall into place. I'll force it. I have Jack Layton's quote as my screen saver, and I believe it in. I will change the damn world.
A tall mountain to climb. Or something.
